So if you find that you’re frequently asking yourself “How good a teacher am I?”, take a deep breath and relax. You’re doing fine! You probably never really thought about it but you’ve been teaching your kids since Day One. You are a teacher – it has always been a part of the parenting job!

Teachers matter…they play a critical role in child education.  In addition to serving as surrogate parents for a portion of the day, they have an impact on how children view course material. Teachers who are enthusiastic about the material galvanize students with their passion. In traditional American schools, however, teacher enthusiasm can become blunted after repeatedly teaching the same material over and over again. Homeschool parent-teachers don’t need to refresh their enthusiasm for the same-old material…it’s hard to feel bored when the subject is as new to you as it is to your child! The excitement you exhibit gets your child-student engaged, interested and curious…so be an infectiously enthusiastic teacher!

In case you’re still worrying, though, here are five tips on keeping yourself in check as a hybrid parent-teacher:

1. You may have preconceived notions of what a classroom is, and what school means. The homeschool classroom of today can be almost completely virtual or it can be a room set aside for learning and decorated like a classroom. It can be a formal space or a temporary “during the day” kind of space…but it doesn’t have to be a traditional classroom.

Think about the specific tools your child uses to learn. Is it an e-classroom, with a focus on technology? Is it an early childhood education space, communicating visually to foster the child’s social, physical, intellectual, creative and emotional development? Whatever direction or type of program you choose, remember to make sure your conception of classroom is compatible with how your child learns.

2. Likewise, teaching doesn’t have to be compartmentalized into pre-arranged classes. There are teachable moments throughout each and every day…embrace them! Depending upon the child’s (or children’s) age, different types of programs  (online and otherwise) can be much more flexible in structure and scheduling.

3. A parent can’t just be a strict, traditional teacher. Those aforementioned teachable moments can also be humorous moments…being able to laugh with your children is critical. And as a parent-teacher you need to be supportive whenever possible, sympathetic when needed, and firm but fair when necessary. Just as your child possesses a specific learning style, a homeschool parent should work on identifying their own appropriate teaching style

4. You know your children best, so incorporate their passions and interests. Sure – some kids think learning is fun and embrace it, but others may appear to need some coaxing. The truth is, kids love learning…but like adults, they dislike being forced to learn.

In a classroom setting without any context, learning about math percentages can be boring and difficult; when seen through the lens of your child’s specific outside interest, however, percentages become much easier to understand: think batting averages, the amount of life remaining for a video game character and shopping discounts. Don’t be afraid to use their interests to make learning more relevant. In fact, the more you can relate their studies to their interests, the better they’ll learn, the more they’ll enjoy it…and the easier it will be for you as the teacher!

5. Here’s a question I hear frequently: do I need a teaching certification to give my children a proper education? The short answer: you already have one…it’s your child’s birth certificate. As I mentioned above, you’ve been their teacher since they took their first breath…so don’t second-guess yourself now! Homeschooling parents are effective teachers because they are with the same students year after year and are in the best position to understand the student’s strengths, weaknesses, interests and moods.

Still not convinced? Research has shown that not only is there is no correlation between a child’s performance and teacher qualifications, but that having a Bachelor’s degree in education may actually have a negative impact on student math scores!

If you feel certifications or degrees will make you a better teacher, than by all means pursue them. But realize that this is something you are doing for yourself, not for your child. You’ve been their teacher since…well…forever, and you never received a ‘License to Parent.’ If a certificate or education degree framed on the wall makes you feel better, that’s perfectly fine. But homeschooling is about the art of the possible – even when it runs counter to the traditional – and frequently inferior – learning methods that “certified” teachers employ.

Remember, being a good teacher is a part of being a good parent and there aren’t any hard and fast rules. Like parenting, teaching is all about being responsive to the needs of the child. You don’t need a formal classroom with structured classes – almost everything your children do throughout the day offers teachable moments!

My answer: you don’t.

As a mother, you have been the primary teacher to your child from the moment the doctor laid that precious baby in your arms.  It was you who taught them to say “please” and “thank-you”; it was you who taught them to walk, to talk, to get dressed, to be respectful, to obey rules, to eat . . . You taught them how to accept disappointment and to handle victory.

Did you ever consider switching roles between mother and teacher then?  Of course not! It was all in a day’s work and it has been rewarding!

This is how you must approach homeschooling.

You are a mother.  And as a mother, you have been a teacher for many years.  Perhaps you wonder how you can be effective as an academic teacher without teacher training?  If so, click here and read my post on Homeschooling Certification. Bottom line is, you can do it because you have been doing it! And as you will see in the certification post, you can do it better!

• So don’t stress about switching between mother and homeschool teacher.
• Don’t plan to have them call you “Mrs ____” during homeschool hours;
• Don’t try to recreate a classroom as you remember it.

Just be you.

• Look for teachable moments throughout the day.
• Adjust to your student’s needs, interests, passions.
• Laugh with them and encourage them to keep trying when the going gets tough.

Remind them that you too struggled in school and don’t be afraid to share those struggles with them.

And most of all, remember why you are doing this.  For many of us it is to provide a solid foundation for our children in addition to strong academics.  For others it is to allow for a more flexible schedule.  Still others seek to ensure that their learning disabled student is getting the best education possible.

All all motivated by love and commitment. And when this is your motivation, you will not fail.

Often we are sure we can speed up the learning process if we just impart our wisdom and academic expertise to our children through a “lesson.”  So, we set aside time to go over whatever it is we are sure they need to know next, we prepare what we want to say, and we conduct our “class.” Okay, okay, most of the time we don’t go through quite the formal process explained above, but you get the point.

How often do we see our kids struggle through a math problem? Or get frustrated about a writing assignment or a science question where the answer is so close and yet so far away? For those blessed with patience, this is easy-let them work through it. For others who are schedule oriented, it is much easier to step in and show them how.

It is such a challenge to know when to allow our children to struggle and when to step in and solve a problem for them.  I hate to see my kids struggle–but I am learning that when I allow them to solve a problem by themselves, they will remember what they have learned much better than they will remember what I did to solve it.

For my 7th grader, Math has always been a struggle and this year is no different. She is actually pretty good at math, but tends to rush and miss key steps. So when a more complex problem comes along, she will turn to me for answers. In the past, I would sit down with her and walk her through each step. However, I have learned to force her to work through the problem on her own, focusing on analyzing the formula and outlining the steps she needs to take to find the answer. Does she find this annoying–absolutely! But she rarely comes to me for help with the same kind of problem more than once.

This principle applies to life lessons as well. We want our kids to grow up to be wise; to make good choices; and to be successful in whatever they do. But sometimes that wisdom can only be developed by allowing our kids to struggle with life on their own and experience the consequences or victories that result from their decisions. What better way to learn? When we approach our children this way, we become a coach rather than a teacher–encouraging them when they are on the right track and steering them back when they are not.

I find myself all too often in “lecture” mode on how to behave, what the right decision in a particular social situation would have been, how their decisions are affecting how others view or trust them . . . all important lessons.  But I would suggest that if you are like me–finding it necessary to repeat those same lectures over and over again, then your approach is not working.

I am not saying we throw our kids out there and let them fend for themselves.  Rather, that we are willing to take a step back and let them learn from their actions (within reason of course–we do not want them to end up extremely frustrated or in a situation that is dangerous).

Test it out! Next time your child is struggling with an academic question, give him the tools to solve it, then step back and watch learning take place. Better yet, next time he is making a decision that may or may not be wise, let him make it and be ready to coach him through the consequences when they come.

Miss McCullough was my fifth grade teacher and she was amazing! She loved to pour herself into us. She was funny; she was loving; she was willing to steer away from the curriculum and delve into some rabbit trail we started down with our many questions; she would have us pile onto the classroom couch after lunch every day and listen as she read exciting books . . . She was everything I wanted to be as a first-time homeschool mom. In fact, you could say she was my inspiration.

When you begin your own homeschool journey, start with a goal in mind. But rather than set a goal that is simply based on what you want to accomplish, define the kind of teacher you want to be. And keep that goal in mind as you meet the challenges of the day-to-day.

You will have days when you want to pull your hair out-but you will also have incredible days where everything comes together.

You will have days when you just can’t pat yourself on the back; but you will have others that bring you great pride in yourself and your kids.

So define who you want to be in homeschooling. Write it down; post it somewhere and keep that goal in mind.

Go directly to New to Homeschooling Step Ten: Be Ready to Learn

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